I think Love is

I think Love is

Remembering the details

Or a least a part of love is

The tiny quirky things

The mannerisms

How nervous you get but it just takes you time to settle.

How you want to be celebrated. You should be celebrated. 

There's a lot to celebrate.  

There's so much I notice about you. 

I notice that you never seem to remember much about me. 

I notice that you don't seem to notice. 

Letters to Linda #1

Hey Lingy, 

I miss you. I keep looking back at old pictures. I was looking back at that trip when you visited me in Oregon and I took you up to some mountain to sled but instead we pulled over on the side of the road and went sledding on that cheap plastic orange sled down into the ditches. You saran wrapped your knee to keep the water out of the electric mechanism. So fucking classy!!! 

I try to say words that match this feeling but there is (are?) no amount of words that could be enough. If this feeling were sounds, it would be that ugly cry sound where you can’t breathe and you’re gasping for air. There’s so much I miss about you. I miss how you didn’t give a fuck. How you just knew what I meant without me explaining. I miss how you could go from serious to stupid in .01. I miss your laugh. You had this one laugh that was like a good deep belly laugh. Getting one of those was like getting a prize. Sometimes you would cough after. Then you had this other laugh that was more airy sounding. It sounded like short stomach contractions with more of a wheezing vibe. Ya know? Yes you know what I mean. You always knew what I meant.  

I also miss how you would say “what?” after pretending to be listening but not completely listening to whatever bullshit randomness I was telling you. I miss you. I miss you. If I keep saying it will it bring you back? I miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you times infinity and beyond. 

Besties forever,

Jess

I can't believe you're gone. I wish you were here. Or I was there.

Bring Back the Blog

I found this blog that inspired me to write. This wonderful couple details travels throughout Paris and the countryside of France with teeny tiny (beautiful) pictures and lots of great helpful information. There are no ads, no affiliate links, just authentic pure love. 

It's refreshing to find in a time when people are chronically online and short content is screaming and vying for attention and views and adsense and sponsors and and and anddddddd... ugh. 

There is always a place for authenticity and genuinity. The world needs more of it. 

I lost my best friend just over 6 months ago. Her death shook my world to the core and I'm still rebuilding. When you leave this earth.. we all will... what will you leave behind? Your pog collection from the 90s? Ideas and lessons learned with the connections you've crafted? 

If you had the opportunity to cultivate something true and authentic, would you seize it? Even if it was just 5 people, well that would be more meaningful then anything. 

I plan to document thoughts on life, love, grief, deepness and un-deepness, stories of all the stupid shit I've done, intriguing people I've met and lessons I've learned. There will sprinklings of sunsets, pictures of dogs and the sky, yoga, nature, findings in my work, and the city I love - San Francisco. I hope I can look back on old posts and see how much I've grown. Cheers to the evolution of one's self!